how to cultivate happiness

How To Cultivate Happiness In Your Life

Let’s look at how to cultivate happiness. It is not that difficult, but somehow it does get more difficult as we get older.

We all know the line from the Declaration of Independence “Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” but have you ever truly considered what that line means?

Thomas Jefferson wrote the phrase to mean the pursuit of a meaningful life, one that provides someone with satisfaction and happiness in their daily lives. With all of the stressors going on in the world, all of us can use a little extra happiness but creating that happiness can be a daunting endeavor without a little direction.

how to cultivate happiness

How To Cultivate Happiness

Let’s Start With Gratitude:

The Secret Ingredient You’re Probably Overlooking is probably gratitude.

We hear it all the time: “Be grateful.” But why does this simple idea matter so much?

Gratitude shifts the lens through which you view the world. Instead of focusing on what’s lacking, it invites you to savor what’s already here. It’s not about denying pain or pretending everything’s fine. It’s about also remembering what’s good, sometimes even especially when life is hard.

Think of gratitude like seasoning in a meal. Without it, even the richest dishes feel bland. With it, life takes on a richness and depth that might surprise you.

Every night before bed, write down three things you’re grateful for, no matter how small. “The sun felt good on my face.” “My dog was extra cuddly today.” “I made it through a tough situation.”

These tiny noticings build a foundation of quiet joy.

Now What About Deep Reflection?

What are you overlooking in your life that, if suddenly taken away, you’d miss dearly?

Acknowledge the Good

We as humans are generally ambitious and tend to look for ways to improve but sometimes that can mean we only see the bad things in our lives, for example, we may see our home as too small or our job as too simplistic, but we forget to see the good within like the fact that we have a home and a steady job. Taking a step back and looking at the good things we already have can be a great way to create happiness.

You can do this in several ways; writing down 3 things that make you happy each day and explaining why those things made you happy or taking a walk and listing out sights, smells, or noises that make you happy and then briefly explaining why these things created happiness. These things can be as simple as hearing your child laugh or smelling fresh flowers.

Focus On Your Strengths

Positive Psychology is a relatively new research-based field of study intending to help people thrive. Studies being done by the University of New Hampshire have found that building upon a person’s strengths on both professional and personal levels are great ways to increase happiness.

It’s easy for us to look in the mirror and see our flaws but we rarely take the time to look at our strengths. Think about the things you like about yourself and not the things you don’t, look at the things you do great at your job and things that wouldn’t get done without you.

Find Flow in the Everyday: Lose Yourself to Find Yourself

There’s a unique joy in doing something that absorbs you so completely, you forget to check your phone. That state is called flow, and it’s one of the most reliable paths to happiness.

Flow often happens during creative activities, problem-solving, gardening, cooking, or even cleaning — if you’re fully present.

Set aside one hour this week for a hobby or project where time disappears. Paint, play music, fix something, write, hike — whatever brings you into the “zone.”

Reflection Question:

What activities make you forget time? When was the last time you let yourself go there?

Build Quality Relationships

Having supportive people in your life is extremely important and making time to spend with them is even more important. Humans are naturally social beings and in history were known for their close social ties with family and friends. With our busy schedules, we’ve become isolated and not as closely knitted together, which has led to a lack of those vital relationships we used to keep.

Reach out to someone you’ve lost touch with. Or deepen an existing friendship by asking meaningful questions. “What’s been on your mind lately?” “What’s something you’re struggling with?” Vulnerability deepens bonds.

Thought Prompt:

Who makes you feel most like yourself — and how can you invest more energy into that relationship?

Live With Intention

Align With What Matters

Happiness doesn’t come from doing more — it comes from doing what matters more.

Living with intention means making decisions based on your values, not your fears. It means pausing before you say “yes” to something that doesn’t resonate. It’s about choosing presence over busyness.

Try This:

Each morning, ask yourself: “What kind of day do I want to create today?” Choose a word — “peaceful,” “creative,” “energized,” and let it guide your actions.

Self-Inquiry:

Where in your life are you living on autopilot? What would it look like to be more deliberate?

Live With Meaning 

how to cultivate happiness

When most people think of helping others they think of giving money and a lot of people aren’t in a position with extra funds but that isn’t the only way to help. Volunteering with an organization that you believe in whether it be with the animal shelter, soup kitchen, or children’s hospitals are a great way to gain happiness and meaning.

Simply complimenting a stranger, holding a door, or helping someone with a simple task can create happiness for not only yourself but the person you helped as well.

Self-Care 

So many people likely depend on you like children, partners, friends, and parents that you likely forget to take care of the most important person, yourself! Regular exercise, nutritious diet, sleep, and hygiene are a must but a few things that also help create happiness are meditation, yoga, mindful breathing, or taking time for yourself can add to your self-care routine.

Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

Comparison is the thief of your joy. Social media has made comparing ourselves to each other extremely common and we most likely do it without realizing it. Seeing a friend on vacation knowing that you can’t go on one, seeing a friend doing home renovations or buying a new home when you can’t, or seeing someone land a new high-paying job when you’re stuck on the bottom of the totem pole can make you feel crumby.

Take a step back whether it be from social media altogether or finding ways to look at what you have and be thankful and happy can help you to cultivate that happiness you need and deserve.

7 Comments

  1. I enjoyed reading this article. While a lot of it were things I am aware of, just going through them together in one place reminded me of what really matters. We tend to forget the little things especially the good feelings that we feel after doing them. My favourite part was the part about living with intention and asking yourself every morning about the day you want to have. That is something I will definitely adopt!

  2. That really resonated with me! I especially loved how you emphasized the power of mindfulness and gratitude practices in shaping our daily mindset. Your suggestions—like morning journaling, taking mindful pauses, and consciously celebrating small wins—are simple yet transformative. The point about reframing negative self-talk—replacing “I can’t” with curiosity and self-compassion—was particularly inspiring. How have you found people respond when they start these tiny gratitude rituals? Have you noticed any common challenges, and what tips do you offer to help them stick with it consistently?

    1. Well, I am not in the medical field where I can see if this works on others, but I have found my own happiness following through with these things. Gratitude is a huge one, as it makes you realize just how lucky you are as you don’t realize how much you do have until you start to find those things that you simply take for granted. Sticking to it consistently takes a bit of practice, and in the beginning I had to put a reminder on my phone until I got into the habit of doing these things naturally.

  3. Hi Michel,

    Thanks for sharing your insightful post on cultivating happiness. I love how you emphasized the power of gratitude and savouring the good in our lives, even amidst challenges. It’s so true that we often overlook the simple joys and blessings we already have.

    Your point about finding flow really resonated with me. I think many of us have become so accustomed to constant distractions and multitasking that we’ve forgotten the deep satisfaction that comes from losing ourselves in an absorbing activity. It’s a great reminder to prioritize those pursuits that bring us into that “zone” of presence and engagement.

    I’m curious to hear from others – what activities bring you into a state of flow? And how do you make space for them in your life, even with busy schedules and competing demands?

    I also loved your suggestion to align our days with our values and intentions. It’s easy to get swept up in the momentum of busyness and reactivity. Pausing to ask ourselves what kind of day we want to create is a powerful way to live more deliberately.

    Looking forward to continuing this meaningful conversation and learning from everyone’s experiences and insights. Here’s to cultivating more happiness, presence and purpose in our lives!

    Eric

  4. Michel,

    That article, ‘How to Cultivate Happiness in Your Life’, explores timeless, evidence-backed strategies for living with more joy and fulfilment. Here’s what resonated most to me:

    My Core Takeaways
    Gratitude is a game-changer
    Keeping a gratitude journal (just three things a day) has been shown to increase optimism, wellbeing, and even physical health
    Strong social connections matter most
    Relationships, friends, family, community, consistently rank as the top predictor of long-term happiness
    Mindfulness and savouring the moment
    Being present, through meditation, mindful walks, or simply enjoying small pleasures, reduces stress and enhances joy
    Acts of kindness lift spirits
    Whether it’s volunteering or small daily gestures, helping others boosts your mood and deepens connections
    Physical health supports mental health
    Regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and quality sleep aren’t just good habits—they’re crucial components of happiness
    Find meaning through goals & engagement
    Aligning daily activities with your values, whether through hobbies, creative projects, or purposeful objectives, fuels lasting fulfilment

    It’s actually refreshing to see a happiness guide that doesn’t just chase smiles but really values the whole human experience, good and bad. By weaving gratitude, relationships, mindfulness, and kindness into our routines, we’re not chasing some unrealistic ideal, we’re building sustainable joy.

    I love how the science supports small, consistent actions, journaling, mindful moments, acts of kindness. And it’s liberating that happiness includes acknowledging pain or stress, not pretending they’re not there.

    Personally. I do mindfulness walking every morning, and a short gym session as I agree physical health supports mental health. I find it just free’s up my mind ready for the day ahead.

    Kind regards,
    Martin

  5. Very interesting and informative article!!  Gratitude is often an overlooked characteristic in many people’s lives.  Just saying a simple “Thank you” to someone is not only gratifying to the person(s) receiving that statement, but also should be gratifying to the person(s) saying it.  Focusing on our strengths is more effective and even may take care of our weaknesses.  It seems people dwell so much on negative things, too.  “Youthful” living will come about if we focus on positive attitudes and behaviors.  Last but not least, “Make a friend”.  Very well-designed article! 

    Best wishes,

    Kent

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